Bad Apples are of Gold

“It is always the same people who are anchored in changes within the organization…. Maybe it’s time to remove these bad apples from the team…”. The manager opposite me demonstratively places his elbows on the table and folds his hands under him. He looks straight at me. Searching for a confirmation of the words he just said.

Resistance in a teams costs a lot of energy, they say… But when you deal with it in a narrative way, it actually produces energy. In this blog I explain how it works.

Resistance is a kind of Involvement

He invited me because he and his team are in the middle of a change process and it is not going as smoothly as he had hoped. If I can help him with the change story he tells… Of course I can, but for me the question is: “Where do you want to start?”

Many managers find it difficult to deal with resistance within their team. Especially if, as is the case in this team, the contrariness always comes from the same team members. Then managers often think: “Here we go again..”. But what they don’t realize is that the team members in question probably think the same…. 😉.

Resistance is a kind of involvement. If team members really don’t care anymore, they won’t resist anymore. They all think it’s fine and do their thing, or they don’t. When I encounter that passivity and paralysis within a team, I worry much more.

Not with resistance. Resistance is very healthy and of great value to an organization, but many managers do not always realize this.

Influence

The first thing that many executives think of when they notice resistance to the impending change among team members is “influencing.” They stand on soapboxes and tell the story of change again. ‘Roadshows’ are organized from the higher echelons in the organization to convey the message of change.

‘Influencing, inspiring’ are the credos. Or in other words: sending-sending-sending. At best, there is time for a round of questions during these roadshows, but concerns expressed by employees are more likely to be suppressed than a dialogue actually arising. The answers to the questions have been prepared in such a way that there is hardly any room for actual input in the change process.

Top-down ‘we-know-what-is-good-for-you’ management. Too bad, because it is a missed opportunity to really talk to your employees. The result of these kinds of roadshows is that the resistance goes into the undercurrent within the organization. People start saying yes and no, people leave, absenteeism increases to name a few examples. These are all signs that employees are not being listened to.

Giving meaning to the Resistance

Resistance is a form of involvement. Especially the experienced employees often feel very well that things are overlooked in a change process. The difficult thing for managers is that these employees cannot always name exactly what that is.

You can only find out by first taking the resistance seriously. And therefore also to take the employee(s) in question seriously. Regardless of their background and level of education! Because certainly on the shop floor at many production companies, there is quite a bit to be gained in that area…. Literal.

Our natural tendency is to move away from resistance. We prefer not to have any hassle, that costs energy. Things have to go effortlessly and we want to stay in the flow….

But the resistance comes from somewhere. If you ignore that, it will dive into the undercurrent and erupt like a kind of volcano at any time. Ignoring resistance to a change is 100% success that the change you have in mind as a management team will fail.

Look for the resistance and give it meaning together. Start listening instead of talking from the soapbox.

Ask employees about concrete situations within their daily work, where they are afraid or worried that the intended change will not work. Ask employees about concrete experiences in their daily work that they would like to change. Ask employees what they want for the customer or for the organization. In short: go and collect stories. No opinions or statements, but concrete experiences that employees regularly experience during their work and that may or may not be related to the intended change.

Ten to one that these kinds of conversations will result in wonderful additions to the change plan that is already in place. And if that is not the case, then you will in any case create more support within the team through this dialogue than you would have achieved with any wonderful change story.

Old Wounds

It is also possible that the change plans bring back old wounds within the team. “We’ve talked about that so many times”, or “get over it”, I often hear managers sigh. But realize that growth only arises in people from a scar, never from an open wound.

The new approach can just scratch off the scab that was just forming from an old wound and yes, then a wound will bleed again.

As a manager, you may find this difficult or irritating, but it is not up to you to determine whether a wound has healed. Only the ‘owner of the wound’ can do that himself. Comments like ‘we’ve talked about that so many times…’ don’t help with the healing process. They are more like salt in the wounds, which only makes it fester more.

Go in search of the Sting together

There is a good chance that there is still a sting in the employee with old wounds. A sting that is often deeper than it initially seems. Something that again often the employee himself cannot name directly, but which does bother him or her. This sting will continue to fester until it is pulled out.

Again, enter into a dialogue with each other. A dialogue is not the same as a discussion. Try to get past the first superficial assumptions, hobbyhorses, statements and opinions. And above all, don’t be too quick to get into the solutions. But listen to each other. Ask about concrete situations in the workplace, where people were or were not proud to work for the company.

Ways of Listening

Listening in narrative work means listening to what  is not said out loud. Everyone does this, but we are not always aware of it. Every person listens in 3 different ways to what the other person says:

1. Listening in => You then listen to those things that someone says, that you agree with.
2. Counter-listening => You listen to those things that someone says, that you don’t agree with.
3. Listening in between => You listen to what is said between the lines. Often not concretely out loud, but it becomes clear through the use of words, the non-verbal communication and the tone of voice of someone.

The latter way of listening is the basis for the assumptions we make. Both as a speaker and as a listener. In the narrative work, we always say: “There are always three different versions of one shared story. The version that someone has in his or her head. The version that he or she actually speaks. And the version that the other person hears.”

By working with these different versions of stories at work, a change process will be successful. There is a lot of wisdom hidden in it, which can often be converted immediately into concrete actions that make a difference.

Take stories seriously

In the case of old wounds: Ask employees where or when they still see examples of their old wounds on a daily or regular basis. Make it concrete together. Translate it into the work within the team and concrete situations within it. Take these stories seriously. Don’t dismiss them. This is how they experience it.

Employees only really feel heard if they can tell their story and if they are really listened to. By telling their self-healing ability also goes into effect. So there is a good chance that they will also come up with a solution for the resistance they experience.

By listening, you have much more influence as a manager than when you talk. And you will notice that those bad apples turn out to be golden apples, which bring a lot to the organization.

To be continued…

Frédérique te Dorsthorst
BalancedStory
March 2025